(Aging Untold) — Maintaining independence is one of the top priorities for seniors in the United States, but experts say the traditional definition of independence may be setting older adults up for failure.

According to a recent CDC study, many older adults consider living in their own home essential to their independence. The data shows that about one-third of people age 65 and older live alone.

‘We’re all dependent on someone’

Gerontologist Sam Cradduck said the idea of true independence is a fallacy.

“Who’s independent? That’s a fallacy. We’re all dependent on someone,” Cradduck said. “The richest person out there is dependent on us to spend our money so they can keep theirs.”

Cradduck said older adults who rely on neighbors, family members, or emergency services are already receiving assisted care — whether they recognize it or not.

“You’re not independent if your neighbors are helping you with things and your kids are helping you with things,” Cradduck said. “We have a lot of seniors who are calling 911 all the time. So they’re living in assisted living because the paramedics and the firefighters are coming over all the time.”

Cradduck said changing environments — such as moving to active adult living or independent living communities — can, in some cases, provide more independence, not less, by offering better-designed spaces, social activities, and nutrition support.

Financial fears can delay care decisions

Aging expert Amy O’Rourke said fear of running out of money is one of the primary reasons older adults delay bringing in care.

“Sometimes people don’t bring care in because they’re afraid to start that financial clock,” O’Rourke said. “I don’t want to start spending that money because what if it won’t last? And that’s a genuine fear.”

O’Rourke suggested that neighbors in similar situations could coordinate with home care agencies — which often require three- to four-hour minimums — to share a caregiver and split the cost. She also recommended having an outside party review a senior’s budget and assets.

“Maybe you do have enough, but you need someone to reinforce that you’re never going to run out,” O’Rourke said.

Plan before a crisis forces the decision

Cradduck said families should avoid making blanket promises about never moving a loved one into a care facility.

“If you don’t plan for yourself, somebody is going to be forced to make decisions for you,” Cradduck said.

O’Rourke said most families are waiting for a catalyst event to force action, and urged older adults and their families to have financial and care conversations before a crisis occurs.

“The most loving thing you can do for everyone in your family, maybe for your spouse, is help each other get settled where you’re going to be,” O’Rourke said.

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